How To Be a World Class Communicator
Do you believe you are the person you are today based on all of the experiences you have had throughout your life?
This was a question asked of me a number of years ago and it has had a profound impact on my life.
After having pondered this simple yet very profound question – I realized that yes – everything I had done in my life had contributed to who I am as a person up until this very point in time. All of the good times, bad times, jobs, people I had met, every sporting activity I ever participated in had all played a very significant role in what I was capable of doing.
I was then introduced to a behavioural flexibility model based on the work of psychologist Virgina Satir.
The first quadrant to this model is what is termed Blamer. This is not about laying blame, however someone who demonstrates characteristics in this area would be quite assertive, decisive and confident.
The opposite to Blamer is Placator. The charteristics of someone who sits predominantly in this quadrant would display qualities such as caring, soft, gentle and a good listener.
The next quadrant is referred to as Computer. Qualities of someone who spends a lot of time in this space would be considered intelligent, well read, and knowledgeable.
The final quadrant is known as Distractor. Qualities and characteristics – Funny, quick witted, spontaneous.
Where do you feel your strengths are in relation to this model? Based on your perceived strengths – where do you feel you may need to develop? DO you lack confidence? Are you too soft? Do you need to bolster your credibility or your ability to speak publicly without notes?
Regardless of where you find yourself – there are activities you can participate in that would allow you to expand your range of behaviour in those areas.
For instance, if you needed to work on your assertiveness – you could do a martial arts course – Karate or even fencing. Any activity that gets your body into a position of confidence.
If you are regarded as being a little too harsh, perhaps even too forth right and you need to ‘soften’ a little then you could investigate looking into doing some volunteer work – meals on wheels or sitting on a hotline for troubled youths. This is about doing nice things for other people. A place where you can just listen.
If being perceived as being credible is what you need then this is about education. Perhaps a university course. Writing articles, reading articles. Perhaps even writing a book.
Finally, if standing up in front of a group of people without notes is what you want to be able to do then this is about drama and acting. Trying your hand at theatre sports.
I come back to my opening question. Do you believe you are the person you are today based on all of your experiences in life?
Based on the answer to this question and depending upon what you would like to develop in terms of your behaviour – there are activities you can engage in that will give you that range of behaviour.
Leave me a comment below about what activities you are going to try so you can expand on your current range of behaviour.